Dear Brothers and Sisters,
It's now several days that I really want to share and join with you in what I am now.... So today I take the time!
For most of you, you know how it has been a hard time for me at the end of Mallorca, and the days after. I spent a really great time and a lot of healing have taken place during those last weeks now, and I think I reached a high point on tuesday, where I finally completely surrendered, and went still deeper until today. That day, I lived so many healing episodes in once; and it felt so "easy" to go through and then go out, and it started again and went deeper and deeper.
I've made really big step since I am in Belgium... I've stopped my activity of being "independent", where I was known as therapist, it was very symbolic! I've cleared my situation with the unemployement office, and it was a miracle, and made the step to say to the city office I was married, what wasn't done yet. I talked a lot to my parents and our relationship is so great, I can be who I am, I am not afraid anymore, and I did it with my friends too. All that is really freeing for me, and I can feel how I am completely at peace with all what I am in now, and it even changed a lot in my relationship with Erik. Two weeks ago I was guided to go on paltalk, and there was a satsang, a communication with the Spirit, happening that day. I didn't know what it was and so I said it was really great for I'll discover it, as I felt guided, without knowing it was for one person! So the guy asked me what was the belief or the situation that I wanted to give to the Spirit. And I talk about all the anger and the violence I could live and that I don't recognize me in that. And since that day and the week after when I listened to the recording again, so many things have shifted. I integrated completely the fact that I was responsible of everything, absolutely everything that I seem to live. And my mind shifted completely since that day. I was projecting so much before, and now it feels so good to take this back and feel that I am not powerless. I've seen that everything in my life, I've asked for, and so all my perceptions have changed about that. I am not the victim of all that anymore!!!!
I've kept some distance from you all those last weeks, not knowing really why, but I felt kind of something dangerous for me... I could intellectually know it was coming from the ego, but nothing was clear for me, nor integrated. And since tuesday with all those healings and deep recognition, I live miracles every day, and we had a very deep discussion with Erik about where I am now, what happens and what choice I have. I am not still clear on everything, but what I know for sure is that the only thing that I want is serve God's purpose, no matter what it takes, wathever He want me to do or wherever to go. I don't want to have any investment in directing the seeming life of Armelle. I can see a lot of ego tricks, and it's so painful to see that I am sometimes still in it. I don't want that anymore. I want to tell you all, as witnesses of my choice, of my decision, how much I feel devoted to that purpose, and nothing else than that could interest me now. I give everything to God that can still block it, and I offer all what seems to be part of Armelle to serve that purpose. I am so happy for all what I shared with you, all what you offered me, and how you showed me the way by following yours. Now it's time for me to take my step and commit deeply too. And this email is my commitment. I would be happy to be or to come wherever you feel it can be helpfull, and have all the feedback that you feel guided to share to help my way. I thank you all so much, Jason, Kirsten, Helena, David, Lisa, Jenny, Leila, Suzanne, Thomas and Sarah... I love you! And Erik for sure, too....................
I also want to say to Jason to watch the movie "Twilight", it's so goooooooooood.
And lately those last days, Erik talking a bit french, I can feel something deep coming from that for me. it's like speaking in english, the "you", feels totally impersonal for me, I am not used to. And so when he says something in french using the "tu" I feel all the body reacting, and sometimes even tears in my eyes... another step!!!!!
Lots of love to every One
Armelle
