With everything that’s happening about this conference, I am really becoming more and more aware of the stupidity of the world and that there’s really no value in having an attachment in the world nor in a particular outcome. Erik shared with me that it’s also important to recognize that I asked for what happens, it’s my responsibility. And here came one of the most wonderful realizations for me, that I’m in the habit of beating myself up for everything I experience, that yes, I asked for it to happen, but not because I'm still stuck in the same pattern and can’t get out, but because I told the Holy Spirit that I was giving everything to Him and that I wanted the truth and only the truth, and so He is giving me the opportunity through this conference to see the absurdity of the world again, and the only value there is, which is in God. It is absolutely fantastic ...
I asked to see it all, to give myself all these experiences, because I want all the blocks to the presence of love that are still present to return to my consciousness so I can give them to Him. I see that a huge shift has occurred in my mind, because it’s no longer a question of me holding a grievance about experiencing it, of judging that I experience it... there is no more unworthiness, no more reference to the past, no more victim, no more guilt... just total gratitude for this experience that’s offered to me to heal my mind about the world and my beliefs...
I really understand that my happiness is not necessarily in the fact of being physically present at a conference, to be a teacher and that Spirit speaks through everyone, I'm not special! My happiness is in the fact of following God’s Will, which is also mine, but of which I'm not necessarily always aware... So whether this conference takes place or not, nothing changes, the form it takes won’t change anything either, in my state of mind, with the joy that dwells in me, because it gives me more humility and ordinariness, what I want to experience... and it’s the same as for Mallorca... I trust, I let go of pride and I'll be where Spirit wants me... the way He wants me... because that is my freedom and my peace...
LOVE LOVE LOVE,
LOVE LOVE LOVE,
LOVE LOVE LOVE,...
ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE...
Armelle
Translated by Andy
Mar 12, 2010
Sickness is a defense against the truth
While I was swimming I had a very profound realization and integration; it was really strange how it began. I wasn’t thinking about anything, I was just there making breaststroke movements, feeling cold water sometimes, hot water sometimes, and suddenly, I said to myself, "Yeah, it's true, it’s impossible; sickness is impossible because it can’t be part of our nature, we are not these bodies." It had nothing to do with all those times where, intellectually, I told myself that I was not a body; it was something that seemed to fall on me, like that...
It then followed a clear development from that premise...
If I admit who I really am, I can’t be sick, and the closer I get to who I really am, the less I feel the effects of what I believed before, because my mind shifts, and there is no longer a reason to hang onto those old beliefs.
Eckhart Tolle says that sickness is a means the ego uses to become stronger, it creates a new self concept, now I am a sick person, and more.
I then saw my allergy to gluten and to lactose and how it had created an identity in me, of being different and special; so I asked what had brought me to still believe in it, what value I could still find in it... and there was silence. Nothing came... I told the Holy Spirit that I gave them to him, that I could see no reason to keep these beliefs, I no longer saw any value in them, and that now, when I eat some, when I feel it, I no longer feel the effects, or at least I no longer have my focus on it, nor on my body.
Then the fact came to me that the more I enter into my function, recognize who I am, I am my heart, the less I experience the effects of that... it just loses its meaning...
The Course says that "sickness is a defense against the truth." It’s therefore in recognizing the truth of who I am that sickness loses its meaning, its value, and it can’t exist (such that often, I identify with the sickness, that I at first see as an outside entity coming to live in me, even attacking me and then becoming who I am, because I derive a good number of benefits from becoming a sick person, not counting that I get a lot of attention... and I then have an excuse to stop, or to not follow, my heart...) And the ego loves to have excuses to not follow our path, our heart, it finds a lot of them because that’s what it’s looking for. It looks in the world, in form, for the justification of the thoughts, the beliefs, that block me, and once found, it reinforces them and the ego is content...
It then came to me that I don’t have to fight the sickness, nor try to overcome it, or even to cure it because even wanting to cure it makes it true, real... I just allow it to be there, acknowledge it because it shows me that the mind needs correction in one place... and in this acknowledgement, I open the door to the healing the mind... Rather than focusing on sickness, I focus on what inspires me, transports me, makes my heart open and I question my beliefs all along, I watch my thoughts... and I see what blocks are still preventing the presence of light, of love...
I don’t even have to think I’m not a body, or even believe it, I only need to get into my function, to recognize who I am...
For two days now, I’ve been feeling a deep realization that nothing, absolutely nothing, can hurt me, affect me. I don’t know where it comes from, it was a certainty, a knowing that this is so. And I was touched by it again this morning while reading my lesson of the day... recognizing that salvation can only come from me and that nothing outside of me can save me or give me peace, then I also felt that there was nothing outside of me that could wound me or hurt me.
This has happened several times lately, having important realizations, feeling like a deep healing was happening in me and not knowing where it came from or how. But I notice that the more I open myself and allow myself to enter into my function, letting the Holy Spirit use me to serve His purpose, the more I'm present, simply, the more I experience this kind of moment of profound inspiration or healing, I don’t really know what to call them, and it’s not even necessary anyway!
It's just happiness...
Lots of love
Armelle
translated by Andy
It then followed a clear development from that premise...
If I admit who I really am, I can’t be sick, and the closer I get to who I really am, the less I feel the effects of what I believed before, because my mind shifts, and there is no longer a reason to hang onto those old beliefs.
Eckhart Tolle says that sickness is a means the ego uses to become stronger, it creates a new self concept, now I am a sick person, and more.
I then saw my allergy to gluten and to lactose and how it had created an identity in me, of being different and special; so I asked what had brought me to still believe in it, what value I could still find in it... and there was silence. Nothing came... I told the Holy Spirit that I gave them to him, that I could see no reason to keep these beliefs, I no longer saw any value in them, and that now, when I eat some, when I feel it, I no longer feel the effects, or at least I no longer have my focus on it, nor on my body.
Then the fact came to me that the more I enter into my function, recognize who I am, I am my heart, the less I experience the effects of that... it just loses its meaning...
The Course says that "sickness is a defense against the truth." It’s therefore in recognizing the truth of who I am that sickness loses its meaning, its value, and it can’t exist (such that often, I identify with the sickness, that I at first see as an outside entity coming to live in me, even attacking me and then becoming who I am, because I derive a good number of benefits from becoming a sick person, not counting that I get a lot of attention... and I then have an excuse to stop, or to not follow, my heart...) And the ego loves to have excuses to not follow our path, our heart, it finds a lot of them because that’s what it’s looking for. It looks in the world, in form, for the justification of the thoughts, the beliefs, that block me, and once found, it reinforces them and the ego is content...
It then came to me that I don’t have to fight the sickness, nor try to overcome it, or even to cure it because even wanting to cure it makes it true, real... I just allow it to be there, acknowledge it because it shows me that the mind needs correction in one place... and in this acknowledgement, I open the door to the healing the mind... Rather than focusing on sickness, I focus on what inspires me, transports me, makes my heart open and I question my beliefs all along, I watch my thoughts... and I see what blocks are still preventing the presence of light, of love...
I don’t even have to think I’m not a body, or even believe it, I only need to get into my function, to recognize who I am...
For two days now, I’ve been feeling a deep realization that nothing, absolutely nothing, can hurt me, affect me. I don’t know where it comes from, it was a certainty, a knowing that this is so. And I was touched by it again this morning while reading my lesson of the day... recognizing that salvation can only come from me and that nothing outside of me can save me or give me peace, then I also felt that there was nothing outside of me that could wound me or hurt me.
This has happened several times lately, having important realizations, feeling like a deep healing was happening in me and not knowing where it came from or how. But I notice that the more I open myself and allow myself to enter into my function, letting the Holy Spirit use me to serve His purpose, the more I'm present, simply, the more I experience this kind of moment of profound inspiration or healing, I don’t really know what to call them, and it’s not even necessary anyway!
It's just happiness...
Lots of love
Armelle
translated by Andy
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)