Erik: Today an important realization is dawning in my awareness again; one that I've heard before but that is so deep, so profound, and so paradigm-shattering that it inevitably gets wiped out of awareness by the ego and needs constant reminding of. That realization which I'm having again now is this:
Truth, God, Reality, Light, or whatever you want to call It... cannot be found by seeking after It. Truth cannot be discovered by seeking for it; It can only be discovered by allowing It to seek and find us.
The reason for this is because the "I" which the false self cannot find the Truth. The "I" will never find the Truth, because the "I" and the Truth cannot co-exist. They are mutually exclusive. In the experience of Pure Awareness of Truth which is non-dualistic, there is no "I". And so as long as "I" am doing things in order to discover the Truth, the Truth will continue to seem hidden.
It would be like someone running around their house searching for their head. They might run all over the house, searching everywhere they can possibly think of to find their head. What a frantic search it would be, thinking that they'd lost their head! And yet at some point they would eventually get exhausted from the frantic search, terrified at the prospect of giving up and living without a head, but yet becoming hopelessly aware that their search was futile. They would sit down on the couch, surrender to their seemingly hopeless situation, go through all the emotions of despair and self-loathing, and then finally... after having given up all hope, they'd pop through the final layer of emotion and simply become Present. At this point, the awareness of their head would finally reveal itself to them. They'd begin to FEEL their head... and know that it was never lost.
In summary, let God reveal Himself to you. The Holy Spirit knows how afraid you are and
yet knows that full awareness of God is the only thing that you ever really want. You think you still want other things, but you are mistaken. Everything you seek for in the world are attempts to find replacements for the Peace of Mind you believe you've thrown away and lost forever.
Stop searching outside. The Truth is Everywhere, and so you cannot find it by looking in one particular place or another. It is not in any one particular place, person, or "favorable" situation. It is Everywhere and can only reveal Itself to you when you stop seeking for It, and invite It to reveal Itself to you now. Why wait? Eternal Peace is available now. Simply ask... and you will receive.
Love,
Erik
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